UFO Sighting in Area 51, New York on 1890-07-01 12:11:00 – A large testicle

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I was outside sipping sum tea wen my pap flew off the ground and i was like phew cause i couldn't whistle with no teeth, my sister aka my wife also flew off the ground into the large testicle. she was then objected from the orb covered in white gooey substance. she stuck to the ground and is still there to this day. the orb then flew off and landed in the corn field out back, then it started hopping around emitting beams of white light as far as i could see. then military helicopters and trucks came out and started searching the area. it might have been a military exercise but i could not tell you.

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